Quiznos has always been trying to force me to stop eating there. As tasty as the food is, I had a hard time dealing with their commercials. But the turkey bacon guacamole sandwich always won. Today when I went to get the ol’ TBG I realized that Quiznos got rid of the “regular size” and now go with 6″ and 12″ for $6 and $10, respectively. 6″ isn’t enough food. $10 is waaaay the fuck too much to pay for a sandwich at Quiznos. Assclowns.

I walked out and went to Subway instead. Now Subway completely fucked me when they went from the top triangle cut to the traditional pacman cut, but half the morons at Subway were incapable of cutting the triangle properly anyway. They made up for it by adding the itailan herb and cheese bread and by offering to microwave any sandwich for you. And much to my surprise, Subway is running a $5 for a 12″ sub special (in Manhattan at least). That’s a 50% discount (take note, asshats at Quiznos).

So Quiznos, enjoy not having my business indefinitely (or at least until I get really fucking sick of not eating guacamole every day and come crawling back). Fuck you, we’re not friends.

Note: Posts like this are going to have to fill the time until I can get the novel I wrote on my phone out (email connectivity issues from my phone). Seriously I didn’t forget about SXSW, I wrote about a million top three lists for it so I hope I don’t lose this email.